"A winter subway makes a passanger even more alone." I was trying to recall which novel I have read this passage from, alone on a subway, heading to the January gathering of the Atsumi Foundation.

It could be said that Atsumi Foundation's January gathering, the New Year Party with fellows and Raccoons coming together, is the most lively gathering of all. The highlight of the event is when the fellows of that year meets Advisor Itsuko, celebrating her birthday. However, this year's gathering was a place of celebrating New Year, and a place of saying goodbye to Advisor Itsuko—a memorial.

As I stepped in to the gathering hall, lit up with luxurious lighting reminiscent of the chandeliers in the Vienna State Opera, the air carried a sense of quiet sorrow, different from the previous gatherings I have attended.

A picture of Advisor Itsuko was placed at the front of the hall, with a name plate in front. "Atsumi Itsuko." Next to that was a table to offer our flowers. Fellows and raccoons, among other participants, each placed a flower they brought. Flowers of various colors quietly stacked up, as if each of our memories and gratitudes were building up.

As fellows of 2025, we were looking forward to meeting Advisor Itsuko for the first time, and directly celebrating her birthday. It is painful, and truly unfortunate, that things turned out this way, and that we can no longer speak to her.

The New Year and Memorial Meeting was about to begin. As I went to greet her, I noticed a glass of orange juice in front of the picture. I was told Advisor Istuko liked orange juice, and the fact that I shared a favorite drink with her made my heart a little bit warmer.

The gathering this year began with Executive Director Atsumi Naoki's speech. He spoke of Advisor Itsuko's last days very warmly. After that, Shi Jianming from the first batch of fellows spoke of how Advisor Itsuko has supported many students since the establishment of the scholarship.

Afterwards, the 2025 fellows presented a ceramic vase with a big, stand-out light blue rose, as a representation of our gratitude. It was something we prepared for her birthday. Okamoto-san and Yang-san spoke as the representatives of our batch, and the vase was surrounded by even more flowers.

Other fellows also took turn standing in front, speaking of their memories. As I was listening to the stories, strangely enough, I felt as if I am meeting Advisor Itsuko. It was because I could sense who she was and what she believed in through the words.

Advisor Itsuko wished to create not just a scholarship support, but a place of human connection going beyond language and culture, and for such interaction to be a foundation for international understanding. I could sense that this wish was breathing throughout the hall.

Afterwards we began eating, and during socializing, some continued to stand at the microphone to share their memory. I looked at the food placed in front of the picture from time to time, thinking of commonality between the Advisor and myself. I learned that she liked shrimps, and yet again I felt a little closeness to her.

The last activity was the traditional bingo game. As numbers were read out, laughter echoed, and shouts of "bingo!" came along. In this commotion, I believe I am seeing what Advisor Itsuko spent many, many years building.

As the festivity quieted down, and along with a kettle I won from the bingo, I headed to the subway. I am again alone. Yet, strangely, my heart is warm.

The winter subway makes one more alone. Nonetheless, this way back home was different.

Written by: Sherweedy Sarah (2025 Fellow)

Pictures from the day